The Epic Battle between Puppy Kicker and Cute Puppies

Both sides were stacked well for the week, outscoring all other opponents of the league.  It was down to Cute Puppy Peyton Manning, and Puppy Kicker Wes Welker.  It looked as if the Puppy Kicker would finally put an end to all these Cute Puppies. Cute Puppies was scared!

With the final play, the Puppy Kicker kicked with all his might to once and for all settle the score between himself and the lowly Cute Puppies.  I mean really….Who loses to Cute Puppies? All of my life I have trained vigorously no matter the weather, no matter how fatigued I would get.   I knew this day would come; when all of my training would be put to the test.  I went through all of the many ways there are to kick Cute Puppies in my mind from my training days.  There are more ways than you might think.  There are many great kicks such as The DOGlegged, The HotDOGged, The DOGsledder, The DOGmatizer, The BoonDOGler…but I went with my favorite kick of all….PeDOGenesis.  Ped – foot, Dog – evil four legged creature, Genesis – the beginning, or first.  Overall meaning – the first contact of my foot and the evil four legged creature! 

Cute Puppies was quicker than I foresaw.  The leg I once lifted to become victor suddenly felt intense pain.  A kind of pain I had never felt before.  ‘What is this that I now feel?’ I thought.  I looked down, but it was too late.  Cute Puppies too had a finishing move. 

 

 

All of my training… all of my Puppy Kicker ribbons…they no longer mattered.  I, the Puppy Kicker, had fallen to the devious trickery of the EVIL Cute Puppies.

So glad to be out of 10th place

10th place was no fun, thanks Ray

The Puppy Kicker Strikes Again!

From the beginning it was said a lone wolf was out to finally put a stop to the extremely elusive puppy kicker.  All looked well and good for Hungry Like The Wolf, but sadly, the tune would not play on this night.  For the Puppy Kicker was out for blood.....or to just kick another puppy. 

In the end, isn't a wolf just another puppy anyway?

At Last, Our Favorite Time of Year

We've finally reached that moment I know you've all been waiting for. Our favorite time of year. That moment when MY team once again stands alone at the top.  The sole undefeated fantasy squad.  The pinnacle of success.  The team you always dreamed your team could be.

That this moment came so quickly is a testament both to my excellence as a talent evaluator and fantasy coach, but also to all of your relative mediocrity.  But fear not, for I am a gracious paragon.  I will gladly give out autographs and fantasy football tips in limited quantities on a first come, first served basis.  That is, granted that you show the proper level of deference.

That is all.  You may now return to the doldrums of your exercises in fantasy football futility.

The Devil Rays

The Devil Rays are just getting started.

Look at that face.  You know you are intimidated.

I had more points on my bench than some of you had in your entire team.  Give up now, and the mockery will stop.

No it won't.

Will it slow down?

No it won't.  Give up anyway.

I'm thinking that when I put the trophy back where it belongs up on my shelf, I will add a Ray face and some horns.

Claudia's Team: cUte pUpPieS

Team cUte pUpPieS

The perfect team name for a fantasy football team.  Because no one wants to beat cute puppies! What kind of a person are you if you want to beat cute puppies?! They're so cute, and unbeatable.  Wouldn't you feel so guilty if you actually did beat a cute little innocent puppy? That's the same way you will feel if you beat my team, cUte pUpPieS.  Don't run the risk of feeling guilty.  Forfeit, and we all win!

Love,
Claudia

Welcome back future victims. 

This year my team is appropriately named “Hungry Like the Wolf” 

It is named after Duran Duran’s hit song. 

I will be playing the song in my head the whole time I am beating you. 

 Enjoy and fear my new team logo.